An Unlikely Spiritual Practice

Almost everyday, for better or for worse, I log on to Facebook, sometimes multiple times per day. If I can stay away from negativity, I’m sometimes able to connect and catch up with friends and colleagues in fun and creative ways through this social media outlet.

Every morning, Facebook lets me know how many friends are celebrating birthdays on that day. I know from experience that there’s something really sweet about receiving birthday greeting from all your “friends” on Facebook. Sometimes, there are like 20 friends who all have birthdays on the same day. That’s a lot of “Happy Birthday!’s” to write, which could take up quite a bit of time.

One day this month, it occurred to me that the daily Facebook birthday list was a tool I could use to send positive vibes, even prayers to all my “friends” through out the year. It doesn’t matter that I don’t necessarily “know” every single person. I have an opportunity to send light and love to all these people; to meditate on and acknowledge the worth, dignity, and belovedness of about 3,000 specific individuals in my circle of facebook friends over the course of a year just by wishing them a “happy birthday.”

When I look at it like that, wishing a happy birthday to all these folks seems like the least I could do to actively send positive energy into the world on a daily basis, perhaps thereby making it a better place. Actually, this “happy birthday” practice is more for ME than it is for them.


Composition

Since this time last year, more 100 schools, churches, community choirs, professional ensembles, and individuals from around the world have purchased or commissioned my music. I never EVER imagined I could make it this far as a composer.

Thank you to everyone who who has shown an interest in my work; everyone who encouraged me and believed in me; my family, especially my incredible mom for being the very best assistant on the earth; and Lauri D Goldenhersh for helping me share my news and my music with the world.


Singing

Earlier this month, I was elated for my first live vocal recording session since the pandemic began. I had forgotten how much I love session singing. I loved seeing friends and meeting new singers. Plus, I had forgotten how pretty-darn-good I am at this kind of high-pressure gig. I’m grateful to live in a city where this work is possible. Here’s hoping for more! 


Community News

As the chair of Tonality’s Board of Directors, I am pleased to announce that our new album America Will Be has just been released. America Will Be speaks to issues that have been quieted in our attempt to portray the United States as a beacon of opportunity. In styles as diverse as the topics, this music brings voice to the most vulnerable – to lift them up, to reflect on the reality of our society, and to sing about peace and unity. Through our song, we look toward a more perfect union for ourselves and future generations.

Congratulations, Tonality!  Check it out here


Ready to Join the Choir and Sing With Me?

Neighborhood Chorus at Neighborhood Church in Pasadena is now accepting singers on all voice parts. The excitement is building as we turn our attention toward returning to our beloved sanctuary for live worship in September. Neighborhood Chorus is finally coming back in-person with regular Thursday night rehearsals in the sanctuary beginning on September 2 from 7:15pm-9pm.

Conducted by Dr. Zanaida Robles, Neighborhood Chorus is a non-auditioned chorus open to all adults. Our repertoire consists of a variety of classical and non-classical styles, sung in various languages. No training is necessary, however classical choral experience and/or basic sight reading skills are encouraged. Our new Sunday worship schedule calls for the Neighborhood Chorus to sing 3 Sundays per month during the 2nd service only. COVID vaccination is required of all singers, and we will wear masks for the duration of all rehearsals and services.

Please fill out this short form to let me know you plan to sing with us this year. I can’t wait to make music with you again!


For Fun

I actually went out to a thing!

Earlier this month, I fed my soul with some live jazz, compliments of the John Tegmeyer Quartet. Can’t wait to see these cats play again!


And finally (below), here’s Ollivander, the magical kitten, helping me multi-task ❤❤❤

A List of Six Favorite Lists

  • Balance
  • Resonanate
  • Flow

(if I do at least four of these with intention, I’ll have a pretty good day.)

  • Pray
  • Practice Music
  • Exercise
  • Drink Water
  • Do a chore
  • Read

AKA “If Feelings Could Talk“: Not sure who originally came up with this, but I saw it on Facebook and dowloaded the poster for free from teacherspayteachers.com

  • Sadness: I might need to cry
  • Loneliness: I might need to connect
  • Shame: I might need to exercise self-compassion and mindfulness
  • Resentment: I might need to forgive
  • Emptiness: I might need to create something
  • Anger: I might need to enforce some boundaries
  • Anxiety: I might need to breathe deeply (and drink some water)
  • Stress: I might need to slow down (and do less)

(If I do at least four of these, I’ll feel satisfied that, whatever the occasion, it was a successful celebration.)

Decorate
Dress up
Enjoy special foods
Make Music
Dance
Give thanks for that which is being celebrated

From the book by Don Miguel Ruiz

  • Be impeccable with your words
  • Don’t take things personally
  • Don’t Make Assumptions
  • Always do your best
  • Form
  • Texture
  • Timbre
  • Rhythm
  • Melody
  • Harmony
  • Dynamics


(Sometimes “Tonality” is thrown in as an 8th element, but not all music is tonal)



Composition

Summer spree

It has been wonderful to study composition with a private coach this summer. I’m learning to be more efficient, systematic, and disciplined in my practice. I still have so much to learn, but my productivity and stamina have increased tremendously. I’m working on five different projects right now, and feel like I’m actually making progress on all of them.

This pace of work isn’t sustainable throughout the year, but it’s perfect for the month of July. I look forward to sharing the fruits of my labor beginning this fall.


A composer chat for unSUNg

As part of their ‘Holidays in July” fundraiser, I was part of unSUNg’s first composer chat this summer, and the conversation was released on YouTube on July 11. Check out the video to hear me, Amy Engelhardt, Paul Gibson and Michelle Green Willner talk with artistic director Ariel Pisturino about what it’s like to write music for a holiday, which holidays are sorely underrepresented, and what might come next!


Available now: We need a little Kwanzaa

See the program that inspired it all, as a replay of last fall’s “Sharing Music” is available starting today. This diverse program celebrates a variety of December holidays, and includes my settings of “Umoja” and “Kujichagulia”, illustrating two of the seven principles of Kwanzaa. The video performance features the West Victory Dancers, with Olivia Bowman-Jackson and Abdur Rahim Jackson.

https://youtu.be/rax03KiJzYM

Nonprofit Music News

CCDA

I am so excited to begin my first year on the board of the California Choral Directors Association (CCDA) as the R&R Chair for Choral Composition. The CCDA Summer Summit starts on Monday, July 26.  Fall is close at hand, and this is one way we orient our brains towards preparing for our choral programs! You don’t have to be CCDA members to join us for any portion of this, including the meetups!

(I’m going to a couple of the hangouts, including the one in Long Beach with my mentor Jon Talberg at Belmont Brewing Company on Tuesday, July 27th! Hope to see you there!)

Most of the sessions will be available to watch online until October 1st, so you can watch them later if you register.

Registration will be open until October 1st, but try to join us for the live sessions NEXT WEEK! JWPepper virtual repertoire will be available until August 27th.


NANM

The National Association of Negro Musicians held its 102nd convention virtually from July 11 – 14th. Congratulations to all presenters, performers, newly elected national board members, and all 5 national scholarship competition contestants. This convention was truly inspiring!

I look forward to continuing my service to NANM as an at-large member of the national board for the 2021-22 program year.


Tonality

Tonality’s name can be seen in the credits on the Space Jam movie that came out on July 16. We saw it on opening night, just to make sure!


For Fun

Samuel Coleridge-Taylor

Join me on Sunday, August 15 for a virtual celebration of Samuel Coleridge-Taylor’s birthday!

We’ll watch a fascinating talk about the sociocultural aspects of Hiawatha’s Wedding Feast, followed by a virtual sing-along. 


Ollie update

Ollivander has grown so much! He’s 3 months old and hilarious!

purple circles

Boundaries and Circles

Circle of Life
Circle of Friends
Circle of Fifths
Circle of Care
Circle of Security
Circle of Siblinghood
Circle of Service

A circle is a boundary. The 2020-21 academic year taught me a lot about circles and boundaries. I find that when I’m stressed and scared and frustrated and angry and possibly traumatised or abused, my boundaries become more rigid. I don’t have the capacity for flexibility. It’s a fight or flight modality of thinking. When I don’t have enough money, splurging or spending more is not an option. Saving money, however little it might seem, becomes a matter of survival. When I feel my safety is at risk, adventure is not an option. And trust becomes extremely difficult to embrace. When I feel my sanity is hanging by a thread, self-preservation is survival. I can’t risk even the slightest social or intellectual challenge for fear of completely losing it and breaking down altogether. And so I erect rigid boundaries to keep myself safe, to keep me as healthy as possible, to keep me going when I feel like I could break at any moment. I’d say that for many of us, much of the 2020-21 school year was this way.

But I also think back on those moments when a friend reached out to see how I was doing, or when I was inspired by the work and wisdom of colleagues and students, or when my family came up around me to comfort me or to make me laugh. I recall seeing signs in the midst of darkness that there was light at the end of the tunnel, and it gave me hope. And when I saw hope, I felt the urge to push past a boundary and widen my circle. In these moments of hope, I found courage to ask for help one more time. I found enough courage to take an extra step, even when the ground felt like it was crumbling beneath my feet. I felt courageous enough to trust that if I allowed myself to be vulnerable, the benefits might outweigh the drawbacks. Maybe for a split second, I dared to let my guard down and do or say something with a courageous expectation that my efforts would not be in vain. With hope supplied from the loving energy of colleagues, friends, and family; and with evidence of positive change and growth around me in my community, I found enough courage to push the boundaries that were keeping me in my own little safe circle. And this is how my circle grows.

I understand why we need boundaries. We need to know the limits of our circle so that we can survive. We need to know who not to trust, when to say no, where not to go, and when to conserve resources. But as we define and redefine the boundaries of our circle, may we strive to soften it, push it, and draw it ever wider so that we ourselves may grow. After all, this is the circle of life. It’s not a dead, rigid circle, but a living circle that breathes and moves as life challenges and changes us along the way.

Conducting & Composition

I’m thrilled to share that my proposal to present a session called “Come Together: Fostering Meaningful Collaborations between Composers and Conductors” with my friend and fellow composer Dale Trumbore was selected to be included in the ACDA Western Region Conference in March 2022.

Can’t wait to see y’all in Long Beach!

For Fun

kitten with toy
We got a kitten! Meet Ollivander “Ollie” Robles. (more pics to come)

May is the Best Month Ever!

Today, May 25, is my birthday! One of my favorite things I did this month was working with the Neighborhood Church Youth Chorus. I can’t emphasize enough how much I LOVE working with singers under the age of 13. We always have so much fun singing and learning music together, even through Zoom. We made a virtual choir video of us singing the hymn “Do When the Spirit Says Do” with piano accompaniment by Wells Leng. I can’t help but smile and giggle everytime I see it. I hope it makes you smile, too.

Conducting

The Harvard-Westlake Upper School Virtual Choir Concert is on Friday, June 4 at 7pm on Vimeo. I’m conducting “El Aire Lloro” by Francisco Núñez, “Kang Ding Love Song” by Saunder Choi, and “Lift Every Voice and Sing” arranged by yours truly.

Composition

It’s thrilling to be a mentor composer for one of the winners of the Her Voice Composition Competition with Chicago A Cappella.  Sarai Hillman’s winning composition “Safety and Refuge” is radiant, timely, and well-crafted. Plus, Ms. Hillman is just a phenomenal human being, so full of musicality, poise, warmth, and genuine enthusiasm for the craft of music composition. 

Singing

I’ve been practicing self-accompanying on piano. Here’s a video of me singing and playing “Amarilli” by Caccini. I still get tripped up with my fingering, but the singing’s not bad. How’s my Italian?

For Fun

The bad news is that I got rear-ended in heavy traffic on the freeway last month. Don’t worry, it was a slow-speed impact, and no one was injured. The value of my little car was basically the same as the cost to repair it, so it ended up being a total loss.

The good news is that I got a new car for Mother’s Day! It’s a stylish black 2020 Mazda CX3 – a car I’ve always wanted! 

Nonprofit Music News

Tonality is thrilled to be a recipient of the LA Arts Recovery Fund. As one of 90 nonprofits receiving grants, we are excited to continue serving our community and contributing to the rich cultural fabric and economic recovery of LA County! 


Don’t miss NANM’s first virtual convention, July 11-13, streaming live from Philadelphia!  

It all hinges on three little words

Balance. 
Resonate. 
Flow. 

Donald Brinegar

In Donald Brinegar’s conducting class during my first year as doctoral student in choral music at USC, I discovered that these three verbs intersect and support multiple aspects of my life and work. From yoga, to singing, to conducting, to parenting, everything seems better when balance, resonance, and flow are in harmony. The challenge (and the fun) is figuring out what’s out of balance? Where is there a lack of resonance? What’s stopping the flow? Being able to answer these questions as they relate to various situations has been a key component to managing this rewarding and complicated life.

Conducting

Honestly, I miss choral conducting. I miss the singers, the connection, the spirituality, the magic of shaping the way voices touch other voices in shared space. The pandemic has really taken away our ability to fully practice this artform. Hopefully, opportunities for live conducting (if only on a small, informal scale) will happen in the coming weeks with my students at Harvard-Westlake and with my musical friends at Neighborhood Church.

Composition

The more I do it, the more I realize just how much I have to learn about composing music. I’m now analyzing the musical scores of revered composers from across the centuries so I can understand the idiomatic performance characteristics and notation practices of different instruments (especially for organ works). And I’m engaging more with composer colleagues, listening to their wisdom about the composition process. In my work as an adjudicator and mentor with the Her Voice composition competition for women, I get to engage with two phenomenal master composers Chen Yi and Stacy Garrop. I’m just trying to soak up as much wisdom as I can!

Singing

I’ve noticed that sometimes when I’m in a good mood or I feel like celebrating, I spontaneously start singing opera arias I learned in my undergrad days. My go-to celebration aria is “Je Suis Titania” from Mignon by Jules Massenet. Back when I was young, I thought It was the most virtuosic aria EVER, and I enjoyed learning it. I was never was able to master it, but it’s fun to just bust out random snippets of it between classes, in the car, while cooking, or whenever good news comes my way.

What’s your go-to celebration aria or song?

For Fun

My youngest daughter Natalie is a visual artist, and I absolutely adore her art style. Sometimes she sends me her drawaings just to brighten my day. She masterfully draws original anime-style cartoon characters using an app on her phone. I am AMAZED she creates such adorably pictures just with her finger on her phone! Here are three of her recent ones. This character is named “Cheesecake.” It’s Natalie’s cartoon version of herself. I’m completely smitten by my child’s “self-portrait.” It looks just like her in so many ways.


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