Tough month

The first 4-6 weeks of the school/church year are notoriously stressful for our family, as I’m sure it is for most families. But it seems like the start to this year has been exceedingly stressful. Not gonna lie: it’s been really tough. And the sudden passing of my beloved composition teacher Dr. Carolyn Bremer from CSULB weighs on me still.

It’s complicated. Seems like everything is more complicated. Don’t get me wrong. Like I said last month, new settings have added an element of hope to things. Working at Neighborhood Church is a dream come true. My kids are moving forward in their new school settings. My husband survived his work as a singer for the Jewish High Holy Day services (my fellow singers and Jewish friends all know what that’s like!). I have much for which to be thankful. I know there are many in our city whose daily struggles are far worse than mine; whose basic needs for food, shelter, and clothing are not met.

So as we head into October, I’ll be reminding myself of some important truths. For me, these truths include:

1. I can’t take care of anyone if I’m not taking care of myself (everday needs: practice, pray, drink water, do a chore, read, exercise).

2. Being kind is key.

3. Cutting corners is unacceptable.

4. Grief can be a long process (I grieve for my country, my lost loved ones, my lost relationships, my failures).

5. We need the darkness to see the light.

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May 25 is my birthday!

In honor of this occasion, I’m celebrating 10 people/organizations who, through public service and/or artistry have made a deeply positive impact on me since my last birthday.

10. Vincent Robles

<– Duh, he’s my husband.

9. Morris Robinson

Former football player who is slayin’ the classical singing world with his incredible voice. Uses his FB page as a platform for having dynamic conversations about Black Lives.

8. Shawn Kirchner

Composer/Singer who collaborated with my students and me at Harvard Westlake this past April to present one of the most beautiful and artistically satisfying choral performances in my career as a conductor.

7. Tonality

The choir that is changing the world.

6. Beyonce – Coachella

That is all.

5. NANM

The more time I spend with my “aunties and uncles” in this organization, the more my life is blessed.

4. Craig Hella Johnson

Conductor of Conspirare. We met briefly when he headlined the regional CCDA conference at CSFU this past fall. His message and his music at the conference were sublime. But to speak to him face to face was a total experience. One could drown in the depth of love and passion he brings to his art form.

3. The Weekend

Hip Hop singer/songwriter. I didn’t even really like this artist when I first heard him on the radio a few years ago. But over the last year I’ve become intrigued by the sweet, vulnerable quality of his voice. His song “Pray for Me” which was featured in the movie Black Panther has become a part of my personal inner soundtrack.

2. Mornings with Keshawn, Jorge, and LZ

These dudes on this KSPN morning show crack me up on my way to work. Their banter is usually hilarious and often deeply stimulating with regard to social consciousness. Though it’s a sports radio show, they honor musical artists and talk about current events, thereby making me feel connected to the world beyond my little musical sphere.

1. J. Michael Walker

Visual artist. His paintings of women of color are simply extraordinary. Every single one of his works is bursting with love and radiance. I have been moved to tears on occasion just by the art he shares on Facebook.

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Finding home

On Saturday, April 28 at 7:30pm, I will direct a spring choral concert with the Harvard-Westlake Choirs entitled “I Will Arise.” Joined by composer, singer-songwriter, and folk music expert Shawn Kirchner, we explore the musical intersections between Scotch-Irish, Appalachian, and Black American cultures as we consider what it means to find home within ourselves when circumstances drive us far away from the physical homes we know and love. We learn what enables us to rise and redefine what the word “home” can mean and where home can exist. And we discover what binds us together in our search for that home, that longed-for place of simple beauty and peace and timelessness that frees us from despair, loss, and pain. We consider the colorful poetry of 19th century Irish poet William Butler Yeats as he describes his desire to go to such a place:

I will arise and go now, and go to Innisfree,
And a small cabin build there, of clay and wattles made;
Nine bean-rows will I have there, a hive for the honey-bee,
And live alone in the bee-loud glade.And I shall have some peace there, for peace comes dropping slow,
Dropping from the veils of the morning to where the cricket sings;
There midnight’s all a glimmer, and noon a purple glow,
And evening full of the linnet’s wings.I will arise and go now, for always night and day
I hear lake water lapping with low sounds by the shore;
While I stand on the roadway, or on the pavements grey,
I hear it in the deep heart’s core.

– “The Lake Isle of Innisfree” by William Butler Yeats

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Oh, Canada!

The Harvard-Westlake Canadian Choir Tour of 2018 was a great success! Not only did we survive the cold, but we sang well and we had fun. It was wonderful to work with Dr. Jean-Sébastien Vallée at McGill University in Montreal. And Quebec City is definitely on my list of special places to which I hope to return someday.

The townsfolk who attended our concert at the the church of Cap-Santé, were as loving and as generous as they could possibly be. We felt deeply appreciated, especially after our encore performance of Kurt Carr‘s “In the Sanctuary,” when one boisterous Canadian with a handlebar moustache shouted,

“You all make America great again!”

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The Lifting of Voices

I was moved to tears when, last weekend, mezzo-soprano Brittany Logan sang the sh*t out of my arrangement of “Lift Ev’ry Voice and Sing!” She sang it during a choral concert presented by the Bob Cole University Choir and Chamber Choir called “We Can Mend the Sky: Choral Music for Social Justice.” Conducted by my former teacher Jonathan Talberg, the Chamber Choir did a splendid job of supporting Brittany as she wailed with depth and fervor and exquisite vocalism — the perfect voice for my piece. Brittany told me that for her, a young Black American female college student, singing THIS SONG with THIS CHOIR meant the world to her. Tears were streaming from both our eyes as I hugged and hugged her. It meant the world to me, too.

I attended Saturday night’s concert with added pep in my step over having been elected President of the George Robert Garner III Branch of the National Association of Negro Musicians (NANM) the week prior, on October 14. I am so proud to be connected with a centuries-old Black American musical legacy through NANM. And I am filled with honor, humility, and hope as I imagine how I might serve as one of the living links between NANM and music institutions and educators that are finding ways to not only “include” Black Americans, but to give Black Americans a safe space where they can lift their voices and truly be seen and heard in ways that validate their humanity without tokenizing their identity.

I know I’ve said this before: “Lift Every Voice and Sing” is a hymn that connects us to our roots, honors the present, and points toward the future. The poetry is epic and sophisticated. It speaks to our common struggle with brutality and injustice. And mostly, it speaks to the value of EVERY collective human voice that has ever been imprisoned, demoralized, persecuted, and/or murdered. Anyone and everyone can and should sing this song. But for me, and for many Black Americans, this song is our pride and joy. It means more than words can say for this song to be sung to life by our prestigious local music institutions, especially when Black Americans take the lead.

There are lots of great arrangements of “Lift Every Voice” out there. If you are a choral conductor, please consider performing mine. It is published by E.B. Marks Music and distributed by Hal Leonard. For details, go to to https://www.halleonard.com/product/viewproduct.action?itemid=139863.

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