When I was a doctoral student at the USC Thornton School of Music, I was regularly faced with disappointments and challenges that felt too heavy to bear. I often felt like I had nothing intelligent to “say” with my weak gestural skills and my lack of practical knowledge. My classmates seemed so brilliant and knowledgeable already. I felt embarrassed and awkward. I wanted to scream, to give up, to run away.
One day, I felt so woefully ignorant in Choral Literature class that I thought to myself, “Since I don’t feel like I have anything intelligent to add, I wonder if I can come up with something intelligent to ASK. What’s missing from the conversation? Who’s missing from the table? What details might be missing from the story? What’s missing from what they’re trying to teach me?”
I realized that contributing good questions could be more valuable than knowing the answers. I didn’t want to ask questions just so I could get answers right on tests. I wanted to ask questions that made me care more about what I was studying. So, I got really good at asking questions, and this is probably the most important skill I learned from my time as a doctoral student.
From the lens of curiosity, things started to change. One of the simplest, most important questions I learned to ask in times of conflict is “What would it take?” This was a question I learned to get good at answering by myself – answering this question first prevented me from making mistakes and asking lame questions out loud. It prevented me from engaging in useless busy work and futile arguments. And it helped me realize that some tasks and assignments that SEEMED useless were actually the answer the question.
- “What would it take for me to feel better?”
- “What would it take to get there?”
- “What would it take for them to give me what I want?”
Then, if necessary, I could ask these questions of friends, teachers, fellow stakeholders, and even opponents. Asking “what would it take” usually yielded immediate and astonishing results. This question leads to another great question:
“Do the benefits of pursuing and attaining this outweigh the drawbacks?”
The wonderful thing about the “benefits vs. drawbacks” questions is that there’s never a wrong answer – the answer must only be right for the person answering, and the response is almost always either “yes” or “no.” The truth is, that answer can also change depending on the circumstances. How freeing this feels to me! And answering this question can lead to making lists of benefits and drawbacks, which can provide enough clarity to get back on track after having drifted into a low-visibility or seemingly hopeless situation.
So what are we curious about? What’s missing from the story? Who’s missing from the table? What do we want/need most right now? What will it take? Do the benefits outweigh the drawbacks?
Are we curious?
Composing
You guys!! Having my carol “Now the Rejoicing” included in the historic Oxford “Carols for Choirs 6” collection is truly an honor and a dream come true for me! This anthology series is legendary in the choral world, and it’s such a thrill to have this piece selected by Bob Chilcott, David Hill and Oxford University Press. It’s available from J.W. Pepper if you’re looking to add some new rep to your Christmas programs…
Conducting
Join us in August for our first Summer Choral Intensive with the newly-formed Zanaida Stewart Robles Singers! There will be beautiful music and a US premiere of my “Blühende Bäume”, and our venue at the Neighborhood Church in Pasadena is just gorgeous. It’s a chance to work on your choral chops, rediscover the joy of singing together, and perform with a live string ensemble.
We’re particularly in need of tenors and basses, but all are welcome. If the program fee is the only thing holding you back, please contact me, and let’s talk.
Details are in the flyer above, or click the button below to go straight to the registration page.
To keep an eye on what this amazing new ensemble is doing, you can also join our Facebook group for the ZSR Singers, and be sure to follow us on Instagram!
For Fun
Here’s a little visual tour of what I’ve been up to this month — it’s been busy! Pictured:
- High School Scholarship Competition of the Georgia Laster Association of Music, an affiliate of the National Association of Negro Musicians (NAMN). So proud of my daughter who won second place, singing “Del Cabello Mas Sutil” by Fernando Obradors.
- Juneteenth dress I wore all weekend long!
- Silly and sparkly before the choir concert at Neighborhood Church
- Spending time talking shop with my composition buddy, the amazing Amy Gordon
Ollie’s Corner
Ollivander wears many hats: here he is as fashion model, guard kitty and office assistant!
Original email newsletter — June 25, 2023. Join Zanaida’s mailing list here
